William H Macy is my Grandfather!

Well not officially,he just plays a character that is a carbon copy of my late Grandfather. I just finished watching Showtimes's version of Shameless starring one of my favorite actors.I love this show! Yeah people tell me the UK version is better, if that is the case I dunno, it just might blow my F****ing mind cuz this American version is faaaantastic! It's also the first time I stand corrected with a claim that a certain actor can't act. Justin Chatwin, wow... I loathed Justin Chatwin with a passion, I told everyone the minute he was attached to the live action Dragon Ball Z movie that it was going to be a cinematic abortion. Nobody believed me, they still thought Fox actually cared about the fans...the fools. But Chatwin is in fact a GREAT actor and in Shameless it's clear he was only being held back by directors who had no idea how to utilize him...the fools!

One of the things that kept me glued to this series is the incredible performance of William H Macy, playing Frank Gallagher. Father to 6 kids and a complete F*** up. His portrayal of a selfish, swindling, bottom feeding, raging alcoholic is spot on and reminded me of my own step Grandfather. Every single time Macy is on the screen screaming drunken rants I would say to myself," My God, that is my Grandfather"

A degenerate drunk, my Grandfather was known by the whole neighborhood. Like Frank, people accepted him for his disgusting ways and merely ignored him when he was passed out in front of the local church. Born of Cuban descent he came to this country and got a job as a Barber. You would think the patience required to cut hair would have a calming effect but he was always an angry man, as young as I could remember he was always yelling and fighting. I often wondered why my Mother put up with a man who did absolutely nothing to help raise her and her sister.I guess it's one of those "things". One of the funnier stories of this tragic tale would be how my parents would take me to get hair cuts from this man. What kind of parent takes their child to sit and submit to the hands of a shaking drunken fool with scissors??? Thankfully the madness stopped (and my fears confirmed!) when the moron cut my ear. I never understood that choice, perhaps my mom was trying to keep some kind of window open for me and him. That in allowing him to cut my hair was in a way quality time that would someday flourish. Maybe we'd go fishing and talk about the old times and the ear cuttings and laugh,laugh...laugh. That's the only reason I can think of now because I have hair impossible to cut with scissors, so..yeah..that HAD to be the reason...right? Sadly what my mom never could admit to herself was that he ever wanted to be a part of our lives, especially mine.



One day, when I was 14 years old I passed by to see my aunt whom I was closer to. It was about three in the afternoon and my Grandfather had already finished a bottle of Jack. He would mumble to himself and pace back and forth around the house until he stopped, faced my direction and proceeded to rant about my mother. The filth that came out of this man's mouth still angers me till this day. So I finally lost it and told him off. Looking back it was probably one of the defining moments that made me the confrontational man I am today. Of course arguing with a drunk is like beating a dead horse and he charged at me,a 300+ man coming at a scrawny 14 year old. My aunt held him back and there I was standing tall like that kid from 300 ready to take on that wolf. There is no doubt he wanted to fight me, the rage in his face said it all.

I believe alcohol brings out who you really are and my Grandfather's reaction to me telling him to basically "f*** off" was the reaction stemming from years of resentment. A deep seeded hatred that had developed toward my mother, all her success and her offspring. I left that day only to show up again years later....when he was dead.

I shed not a single tear for the man. Why should I? The man did absolutely nothing for us as a family and did nothing worthwhile for his own life. He only existed and just like that he is nothing more than just ashes back to the ground. There is one thing I got from him. Thanks to his fine example of alcohol abuse I stood away from the stuff growing up for fear I end up hooked on it and laid out around the neighborhood pissing my own pants like dear ol' Grandpa did.

William H Macy must have channeled something dark for this character and I would love to ask him what he's done to channel that. Every look he gives are the looks I witnessed myself growing up from a man who hated life. Season 1 just finished and I can't wait to see more.On another note,thankfully my father is still alive and the best Grandpa you can ask for.I know he saw what went down with my Grandparents and while we've never officially spoken about it I am sure he knows how I feel about the whole situation. It's almost like he's made it a point to be the total opposite. I have more stories about my other Grandparents and more adventures but that's another story for another time.